Lessons learned from ‘Oprah’s Big Give’

Editing TV is hard
It has to be. Otherwise this show might make more sense. But it doesn’t. I confess that I had to rewind my TiVo a lot to try to piece together what was happening. We never know where we are, who’s helping who, what the motivations of the helpers might be besides getting to do stuff on TV, what happens after, if there’s a gift tax involved, or whether or not the recipients just blow the cash on Fendi bags. Nothing. I suppose OBG will do a “where are they now” episode on her talk show six months down the road. Or not. It might depend on whether or not this show gets the ratings it needs. Either way, I was sort of confused.

Malaak Compton-Rock has an awesome name
Seriously, doesn’t Chris Rock’s wife sound like she’s a one-woman break-dancing crew? You expect her to say, “Hey y’all, I’m Malaak Compton-Rock and these are my Malaak Compton-Rockers!” And then she spins around on her head. That doesn’t happen, though. And the show passes without anyone noticing how cool her name is. But I noticed, Ms. Compton-Rock. I noticed.

You have to do things Oprah’s way
They kick people off each week. Doesn’t that sort of diminish the show’s capacity to big-give with each passing episode? Doesn’t it take a village to big-give properly? Turns out it doesn’t. And you get kicked off by a team of judges: Tony Gonzalez, Jamie Oliver and Malaak Compton-Rock. They actually rate the contestants on presentation and emotion and whether or not they liked making tons of phone calls. I think “eyebrows” must be another category, given the TV-readiness of all these folks. Anyway, the one woman who didn’t dig all the cell-phoning (a transit worker who seemed the happiest of anyone to get on the show at first, even declaring that she’d “eat a snake” if she had to) was shown the door by episode’s end. Dang. Couldn’t they at least have gotten her to eat the snake first?

At show’s end, only one big-giver will be left standing. And then what? Well OBG says that the final contestant has no idea that this is going to happen but that she is personally going to give that winner $1 million. Just to spend. On themselves. Suddenly, big-giving is much more attractive to me. I plan to audition for season two now.

This is not about Oprah’s cult of personality
Because she says it’s not. Nor is it about comparing people’s tragedies or judging the quality of philanthropy based on how big a show is put on around it. It’s also not about feeling disoriented and lost afterward instead of inspired. Because I feel inspired now. I do. I’d better. Look, OBG, don’t come after me now. Please.

Dave White is the author of Exile in Guyville. Find him at www.imdavewhite.com and he’ll hook you up with Jamie Foxx.

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