As she recovered and felt increasingly empowered, Hoda was inspired by the consistent support from family and friends. “My sister, Hala, was a lifesaver. She came on the day I was diagnosed and didn’t leave.” Hoda’s brother, Adel, also provided invaluable support, as did her mother, Sami. “My mom was unbelievable,” she says, and “I have friends that make me feel like the luckiest person on earth. I really have people who stand by me and were there all the way.” There were times, Hoda says, when friends who provided the opportunity to laugh in the face of all the ugliness and the pain allowed her to see through to a new day: “You know, I had people in my life who could just make me crack up when I felt like dying; they just picked me up.”

It was also during her recovery that Hoda was able to return to the one place that can always bring her peace, where she was able to again regain her physical strength in walking, and eventually running, as her body healed. “I found a lot of peace in Central Park. I went running every morning up until the day of my surgery, and the minute I could get back in the park, I did—it’s like church for me; it’s like home.”

Personal and professional clarity
For Hoda the period following her recovery was also ultimately a time of personal and professional clarity. “I got divorced. It was crystal clear to me,” she says of the resolution of the marital issues that she had been experiencing. On the professional front, she made another leap and put herself in the running for the job of co-anchor of the fourth hour of the Today Show. “I was doing Dateline, and when I was done with surgery I went and [told NBC] and that I wanted to do the fourth hour of Today,” Hoda says of the goals that became clear in the aftermath of her diagnosis. “I thought it was like a dream thing, and I wondered if it would ever happen. But I had courage. Who knows if those conversations had to do with anything, but I know that I said my piece, and I felt as comfortable in my own skin as I’ve ever felt.”

Whether Hoda’s newly empowered voice came into play with her meetings with NBC executives, she’ll never know, but she was awarded the position as co-anchor on the Today Show, beginning her new job in September 2007. Still, at that point she had not gone public with her breast cancer story. “I was nervous initially because it’s a really sensitive part of you,” she says of her reluctance to share the experience. “Sometimes you feel it’s safer if you lock it up inside.” But two experiences would change her mind and lead her to share her story on the air during Breast Cancer Awareness Month in October 2007.

Woman and Cancer features TODAY's Hoda Kotb on the cover of this month's magazine.

The first was a chance meeting with a stranger on a long airplane flight. Sitting next to the man who would inspire her, she says, she was immediately intrigued by his friendly, engaging manner. “Normally, you know, you put your iPod in, you tune out. Not this time. He started talking to me right away. He was very chatty; he asked all sorts of questions.” One of the questions the stranger asked directly had to do with the compression sleeve that Hoda was wearing to guard against lymphedema following her mastectomy. He wanted to know not only why she was wearing the sleeve but exactly what kind of operation she had just been through. And Hoda, who had not been sharing her story to this point, took a leap and opened up: “I liked this guy a lot, and I said, ‘Okay, I’m going to tell you. I had breast cancer.’” But she also told him that she didn’t want him to remember her as “that girl with cancer,” that she was afraid that was the only image he would keep of their meeting. And that’s when the stranger delivered what became for Hoda defining advice: He said, “Breast cancer is part of you; it’s like working at NBC and getting married and going to college. Don’t hog your journey; it’s not just for you; think of how many people you could have helped on the way home.”

This encounter was magnified by another experience that similarly told Hoda that it was time to open up about her story in a public forum. Trying to cross the street and get into Central Park to go for a walk a couple of months after her surgery, Hoda saw that the street was blocked by a group of people, walking and running. She saw lots of pink but wasn’t sure at first what was going on. As she stood on the sidewalk and watched, it became clear—it was a breast cancer walk. “I stood there on the sidelines and started applauding—I was by myself—and I stood there until the last person came by. I had tears coming down my face. They were waving and they were proud and they were doing something. And it was so symbolic for me: I was on the sidelines and they were in the game. And it was time to get in the game.” With those two experiences serving as inspiration, Hoda made the decision to go public with her breast cancer story.

NBC News video   Kotb: ‘Cancer made me fearless’ Oct. 18: The TODAY anchor shares her video diary about her personal battle and the moments before and after her mastectomy. Today show

In October 2007 Ann Curry interviewed Hoda on the Today Show about her journey. The response to her story, Hoda says, has been unbelievable. The first e-mail post she read in response to the interview was from a 50-year-old woman who said she was going to get her first mammogram as a result of hearing the story. “That makes your heart burst,” Hoda says. In the time since, she is continually amazed by the number of people her story seems to have affected and by the bond that exists effortlessly among survivors. “This is an incredible platform to be able to help people. Now I walk down Broadway, and women hug me—and many have been through far worse.” And repeatedly, she says, she is humbled by the strength of the women she meets and by the gratitude she feels to be able to make a difference: “My God, no matter what you’ve been through, someone has been through worse, and it’s our responsibility as human beings to help people.”

There’s no doubt, Hoda says, that she also feels a renewed responsibility as a journalist having now shared her own very personal experience. “When I ask someone to speak to NBC about whatever their personal story is, I think I’ve always been sensitive but never more sensitive than I am today. Because once someone reveals a part of themselves, you have to handle it so gently; you have to handle it with kid gloves.” It was her own experience in overcoming the challenge of cancer, she says, that allowed her to truly appreciate the depth of resilience that many of the people she has interviewed in the past have shown. “I think I’ve learned a lot over the years from people, and I don’t think I realized how much I needed that until 2007. I’ve met so many people who have overcome incredible odds. I sat across from them and listened to them, and I thought I felt what they were going through, and I thought I’d heard every story of resilience; and then I would hear one more. And I couldn’t believe that people could get out of the fetal position when their life was caving in and figure out how to stand up. But I needed all those life lessons to help me.” It was those stories of perseverance and triumph, Hoda says, that got her through. “I kept remembering different people whom I’d interviewed, and I thought, If they can do it, I can do it.”

Now, as she moves forward, it is that same sense of possibility that Hoda hopes she can pass on to other survivors. “There’s nothing I want to do more now than help other women who are going through [breast cancer]. When you’ve walked in those shoes, to be able to make the path a little smoother is a gift.” But it’s a path, Hoda knows, that is treacherous at times. “It’s overwhelming, and nobody wants to hear, ‘It gets better.’ But there’s a time in our lives for all of us, no matter what’s wrong, when we’re all in the fetal position, sucking our thumbs—all of us. The question is, What do you do when you’re down there?” This defining moment, she says, will make all the difference: “Some people tend to stay down there longer in that position, and some people stand up. Somewhere deep, deep, deep down in that place you can barely touch—that’s the place you have to find the strength to stand up.” Because if you can raise yourself up, you have an incredible gift awaiting you. “If you survive breast cancer, it could be the best thing that happened to you because suddenly you are empowered; because you have strength now; because you realize that your life has margins — it’s to be valued and not wasted.”

Not wasting a moment herself these days, when we speak on the phone Hoda has recently returned from delivering a speech to breast cancer survivors. She feels incredibly certain about her own desire to make a difference, and each encounter with her fellow survivors confirms her commitment. “The instant kinship you feel with people who have been through it, it’s amazing—the intangible bond.” And she’s certain, she says, that this is the direction her life was meant to take. “I don’t know how many more minutes I would have wasted in my life if it hadn’t been for this—maybe a lot more. But instead I feel like I’m on this direct path.” In continuing to share her story of survivorship and to nurture the compelling stories she delivers on the air, there’s no doubt that Hoda’s voice will continue to transform and transcend.

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